I lived in Spain for seven years, but when my partner and I separated, I became homeless. In the morning, I had a house and everything, but in the afternoon, I was sleeping on the beach in Brighton, that’s how quickly it all happened. I came back to England and I assumed the council would do the right thing and help me, but they didn’t, and I ended up homeless on the streets.
Even my friend who I’d known for ages deserted me. He was my best man, and I was his best man – and we’d always got on. It was alright when he was coming around and I was helping him through his own difficult times, but sadly I never got that back.
I did make some nice friends on the street and still have one friend called Glen who I met at a night shelter. Like me he had been homeless and he also went on to work for Emmaus. He’s still working in the homelessness sector, just not with Emmaus. He’s getting married next year, so we’re going up to Wales for that, which will be lovely.
When I came back to England I was on the streets. I had a local connection with some family members who lived in Hove and Brighton, so I thought I had everything in place, but I was turned down. I just had to take it on the chin.
Traumatic experience
I was on the streets for three months and saying it was tough is a huge understatement. I got stamped on when I was on the street, assaulted with a knife and lost teeth. People used to come out of nightclubs and target homeless people like me, just trying to survive.
Rough sleeping is a traumatic experience for anyone going through it. The constant fear of being attacked whilst trying to get some sleep never leaves people. I have not rough slept for over 15 years, but I still have dreams where I am becoming homeless again, and I wake in absolute terror that my life is about to fall apart again. I know enough about housing law and places I can access that I will not need to rough sleep again, but if a dream can scare me like this, imagine how terrifying the thought of possibly being homeless again is to someone without that knowledge?
When you become homeless, every bit of control of your life gets ripped away. You lose all your decision-making choices and are reliant on being helped by local authorities or outreach teams.
Sometimes I look at my life now and say, “I’m bored”, but I have to slap myself and remind myself what I’ve got now, and how life was back then – and I quickly realise that life isn’t that bad after all.
I got a place at a night shelter and then transferred to a hostel in Clapham, but I got notice to leave there on my birthday, of all days! They gave me my birthday card and my eviction notice at the same time – and that’s when somebody in there said, “Have you thought about Emmaus?”.
“Loved being at Emmaus”
I had never heard of Emmaus before. I phoned up the Lambeth community and went along and had the interview. I stayed for lunch and got on really well with the people and thought “I like this”, and that same afternoon I was told “you’re in”. I nearly flew backwards in shock! I floated back to that hostel to get my belongings – that’s how good I felt. Emmaus gave me the money to come back on the bus with my belongings because it would have been one hell of a walk.
I loved being at Emmaus Lambeth, it really helped turn my life around. I did everything while I was there – driving, working in the shop, anything that needed doing. I always went the extra mile and always put the work in.
Two years later I left to live with my girlfriend Els in Cheshunt, who actually ended up working for Emmaus too. She’s now the lady I’m married to – we’ve been married for 10 years now. Emmaus gave me a van to move my things in with, which was nice of them.
My friend Glen, who I knew from the night shelter, is getting married on the same day as Els and me, but 11 years later, it really was a pure coincidence. They planned it all and then we realised it was the same day – and it was his wife-to-be who caught the bouquet at our wedding 10 years ago!
Becoming a member of staff at Emmaus
After working at Emmaus Lambeth, I did work with a local authority’s housing support services, but that project closed due to a lack of funding, and I was about to be made redundant. However, the Chief Executive Officer of Emmaus Lambeth, James Hayes, mentioned that St Albans had a relief manager vacancy which I might be interested in. So, I left there on the Friday and started at St Albans on the Tuesday. At the time, I managed Hertford, Barnet and Harpenden shops. I then managed our pop-up shop: Out of the Emmaus Workshop, in St Albans city centre. When that shop sadly closed in April 2024, I agreed to help as relief manager again and worked in the new Letchworth shop before coming to Boxmoor quite recently.
It’s a lovely shop here and well stocked with a good variety of donated furniture, household items and clothing. We have a great team here and we also have companions coming here from our community workshop to upcycle furniture if any items need sanding and re-finishing.
Sharing my story
It’s not only managing the shop, I also get involved in giving talks to local groups, businesses and organisations as a guest speaker. The last one I did was to ‘Kettles On’, a local community group in Hemel, and that raised around £80 for us. They wanted my own story, so I told them what it was like on the street and didn’t pull any punches. I also represent Emmaus Hertfordshire at community events, such as the recent St Albans Community Showcase in St Albans Cathedral. I ran a stall and told people all about our charity, along with our shop volunteers Lynn and Lorraine who gave visitors some info on volunteering too.