Sisters, Annette and Kelly came to Emmaus 5 months ago after experiencing job loss, family trauma and homelessness. With no recourse to public funds, we supported them to have a home in our solidarity rooms. Their story is told by Annette.
Kelly joined Emmaus a few weeks before me, and I then followed. We found Emmaus through another local organisation, Refugee, Asylum Seeker & Migrant Action (RAMA).
When our situation turned for the worst, and we became homeless and without a place we called RAMA. They opened their doors to us. Back in our country, people look out for each other, but we hadn’t seen that as much here, so to have their help meant everything.
We’ve been in this country quite a while, but it never went to really went to plan. We wanted to get our lives together and build something here, but it came to a point where we might have to go back to our country.
I first came to the UK in 2001 because a family member invited me – she is a British citizen. She invited me to the country to be a student and work with her in a cooking business. I was so excited and hopeful. It took a lot to move here, I uprooted the family. After two years of living here, I was kicked out of my family’s home. I was in a different county; I had nowhere to turn it was so scary. Trust became a huge issue for me because still to this day I don’t know why I was made me leave. I had two options really, go back to my country or I needed my sister with me for support because everything was so hard. So, then Kelly came here too and entered my dilemma. This is how everything started. It felt like a tsunami of damage from that. I still suffer with so much anxiety from that situation.
During Covid-19 a lot of businesses closed, and that meant Kelly lost her job, and I was moved to work from home with a huge pay cut. It was next to nothing to live on. You try and go about your situation but it’s staring at you in the face. Not earning the same amount of money and with Kelly out of work, we had no control over what we could eat or buy. It makes you feel desperate. I felt like a burden.
We were living with our niece at this point, but her and her husband started experiencing financial difficulties and they couldn’t have us living there anymore. We had a month to find somewhere else. That’s when we became homeless.
When we both became homeless, it was so tough. We’d never had to think about where our home is or where we’ll sleep – that has never been our reality. We’ve always been the type of people who have wanted to pay our own way. We never wanted to be walking around begging or relying on anyone. My mum was full of kindness, so we grew up in a kind environment. She would never just cook for the family; she would always do extra in case someone comes passing by. Generosity is something we’re very familiar with, but for us, it feels vulnerable having to ask.
When we reached a point where we can no longer provide for ourselves, it hit us really hard. It was rock bottom for us. Before we went to RAMA, I don’t think I slept for a week. When your independence has been taken away, it is hard I tell you. To say, at one point I was thinking what the purpose of living is – you know it was very difficult, but I knew that Kelly needed me. She has been my support; she is such a big part of my life.
When you don’t have access to public funds, there’s only so much most organisations can do for you. RAMA however, put us in a night shelter and they contacted the council, but their hands were tied – they couldn’t help us with any housing.
When we first went to the night shelter we were dreading it, we were planning on sleeping in shifts so we could keep safe. You expect the worst, but it wasn’t like that and we’re grateful that RAMA put us in good place. RAMA contacted Emmaus but at that time the community only had one solidarity bedroom available.
So, Kelly joined Emmaus first while I stayed at the night shelter which I could go to at 5pm each day and had to leave at 9.30am. Emmaus were so amazing because, although I wasn’t living in the community yet, I was allowed to join Kelly for meals, and go to the business warehouse during the day so I didn’t have to wander the streets. Although I wasn’t living here, I became a companion from day one.
When the second room came up and I was able to move in, you don’t even know how good that felt. I wasn’t sleeping on the street but at the shelter you couldn’t make yourself settled – because I knew I was going to have to move on. I was aware this was being funded by RAMA and that they only had limited funds. It was the constant worry of when would it end. I was thinking I was going to have to move to a shelter outside of Colchester and then I would be even further away from Kelly. I was also dealing with health issues at that time. This room at Emmaus came available just a few days before I had to leave the night shelter – I was so grateful.
The first night I spent here was just out of this world. I will never forget it – I felt finally home. The sense of relief was incredible. For all the years I’ve spent in this country, that was one of my most peaceful nights. All I had to do in that moment was just breathe.
Working here at Emmaus, it feels like you’re contributing to the charity, we are all working together to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. Nothing is free – it must come from somewhere. We who know what the cost of living is like, the water bill, the electricity, the heating – know how incredible it is that Emmaus covers it all for us. There are so many people living here, who without Emmaus wouldn’t have a home.
All of the support at Emmaus plays a factor into helping us, having a room, having the support team on hand and having somewhere to work that all helps. But one of the things that makes a huge difference is the friendliness – you could be somewhere where they feed you and house you but the most important thing is the team, the company, the companionship.
We’re feeling very hopeful now. We’re looking to the future; the only way is up. We’d love to get a place just for us. First and foremost, for the first time in years, I feel content. Here at Emmaus, I was finally unable to unburden myself physiologically. We have a home here while we need it, but we also want to give back and make these spaces open for other people that need it. All the companions here, we all get on. We sit and chat. We cook for them and them for us. It feels like a real community.
Through all of this, we’ve learnt we have a lot of mental strength. We’ve had to be mentally tough and we’re never going to give up.
If you or someone you know is experiencing homelessness or are at risk of homelessness get help from Emmaus here.